By Dr. Hope Murphy
Whenever most of us think of the meaning of trust, we probably imagine a child jumping down from a high place into the arms of a father standing below. The imagery makes us smile, as we think of the innocence of youthful abandon. However, somewhere within ourselves, we also think, “Only a child would do that. An adult would know better than to be so trusting.”
The question that we need to ask ourselves is, “To what extent do we bring those same beliefs into marriage?” Meaning, within marriage, God asks us to let go of the reins of control and to trust Him. However, too often, we look at the flaws of our spouse, and WE decide how we need to proceed. WE decide what about our spouse needs to change. WE decide. The thing is, God is not asking us to place our trust in our spouse. He is asking us to place our trust in Him.
When we place our trust in God within our marriage, it means that we are not praying for what we want to see our spouse or even ourselves to become. We pray instead that we and our husband or wife will be shaped into the person God wants us and them to be. Our prayer is not asking God to change this and to deliver us from that in this person. Instead, our prayer is for God to mold them into His will, to make their heart tender towards Him, to give them His way of thinking, and to order their steps in His Word. In short, when we trust God, we want His will to manifest in our spouse as well as in us.
In some instances God will do exactly what we wanted Him to do in our spouse. In other instances, His plan is very different than what we would have imagined. However, when we truly trust God in our marriage and in our everyday lives, we learn that even in the hard places, we can say with unwavering confidence, “God, I trust you.” It is at those moments when we ordinarily would push for our own way, but don’t; that we become like the child who is able to jump from a very high point, knowing with unwavering confidence that the Father, standing below, will catch us.